Thursday, September 30, 2010

Where my mind has been...

For this who knows, I am a Army wife and I am proud to stand and support my soldier in whatever his job gives him. But, as of right now I am so weary on this. 

My husband will be deploying again and my emotions are running like crazy. How can you even get ready again for being apart from the one person that GOD has entrusted you to be with? I have been praying to GOD to help get me through these emotions that are going through my heart and mind. Give me the strength to stand and support my husband and not fall apart in his arms.

I know every day that passes my husband is willing him to be strong for us. But, I know him, been married to him for 18 years and I know what he is thinking just by looking at him. I know that every day he comes home after a long day at work that he leaves the soldier at the front door of our home and he becomes my husband and my girls daddy. But, I see in his eyes that he is worried, scared, and the fear of leaving us again is killing him inside. Also, knowing that he will be away from our youngest daughter who he was away for the first year of her life and just really got closed to him and created a relationship with his daughter, that this time with him leaving, he will lose that relationship. Plus, our oldest daughter will be graduating high school and he will miss seeing his first born to walk and receive her diploma. Don’t get me wrong, I will record the whole event for him to watch, but it will not be the same as being there and actually seeing her walk and get her diploma and putting his arm around her and congratulating his daughter himself.

No one doesn’t know or understand what we military spouses go through and we don’t expect you to know or understand. But, the people who run our country need to know the sacrifices that we make and hear our cries and feel the hurt that they put us through every time they send our love ones to fight this stupid war. IT NEEDS TO BE PUT TO AN END with that is JUST MY 2 CENTS!

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